I thought it was me, but it was Low T.

What is Low T?

Low testosterone.

According to experts, when a man’s level of testosterone is low, it might lead to various symptoms, including reduced lean muscle mass, irritability, depression, erectile dysfunction, and low libido.

In our relationship, my husband has completely lost his sexual drive. I could walk by him buck naked and he wouldn’t even look up from his newspaper.

I thought for the longest time it was me. That he didn’t find me attractive anymore– or even worse– that he was having an affair.

So what’s a woman to do? Well, I don’t know how other women might handle this situation, but I tell you what I’m gonna do on my end:

Experiment

The most important thing I can do is be supportive. I remember that my husband was very supportive of me when I was taking certain medication that caused low sex drive.

Having low testosterone has been the clearest inside our bedroom. Rather than becoming frustrated with our circumstances, I will learn to be patient and try to experiment with my husband. Being intimate does not always translate into sex; therefore, we will try…

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What does it mean to ‘open up a marriage’ or to marry someone with an open marriage arrangement? How does open marriage work not only theoretically but in practice?

Wikipedia defines open marriage as “Open marriage is a form of non-monogamy in which the partners of a dyadic marriage agree that each may engage in extramarital sexual or romantic relationships, without this being regarded by them as infidelity, and consider or establish an open relationship despite the implied monogamy of marriage. There are variant forms of open marriage such as swinging and polyamory, each with the partners having varying levels of input into their spouse’s activities.”

There are, of course, variant forms of open marriage. With each variant, the partners have varying input on their spouse’s activities.

Wikipedia also gives some historical context for the genesis of open marriage: “The term open marriage originated in sociology and anthropology. Through the 1960s, researchers used “closed marriage” to indicate the practices of communities and cultures where individuals were intended to marry based upon social conventions and proscriptions, and open marriage where individuals had the ability to make their own choice of spouse.”

“Nena O’Neill and George O’Neill changed the meaning of the term with the 1972 publication of their book Open Marriage. The O’Neills describe open marriage as a relationship in which each partner has room for personal growth and can individually develop outside friendships, rather than focus obsessively on their couplehood and their family unit (being “closed”). Most of the book describes approaches to revitalizing marriage in areas of trust, role flexibility, communication, identity, and equality. Chapter 16, entitled “Love Without Jealousy”, devoted 20 pages to the proposition that an open marriage might possibly include some forms of sexuality with other partners. Fueled by frequent appearances of the O’Neills on television and in magazine articles, the redefinition entered popular consciousness, and open marriage became a synonym for sexually non-monogamous marriage.”

In “Open Marriage and Marital Adjustment” by Dale Wachowiak and Hannelore Bragg, they suggest the ideals of open marriage are:

Here-and-now living combined with realistic expectations: There is a reduction of commitment to and sacrifice in the long-term goals.
Personal privacy: A greater respect for personal privacy than in a traditional marriage.
Open and honest communication: sharing, self-disclosure, and productive fighting.
Role flexibility: open partners exhibit this considerably.
Open companionship: avoiding traditional marriage assumptions of coupledness. This may involve the development of deep personal, sexual relationships with other members outside their marriage.
Equality: equality of power as well as responsibility.
Pursuit of identity: An individual’s uniqueness is valued, and differences are not seen as a threat.
Mutual trust: an assumption that everything is out in the open and that one’s partner is not a possession that is guarded.
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Curiosity about one’s partner is a natural aspect of any intimate relationship. For many, the question of a man’s endowment may linger in the back of their minds, often unspoken but nonetheless present. If you’ve found yourself pondering this question, fear not — we’re here to guide you through the subtle cues and signals that may indicate whether your partner is well-endowed. Let’s delve into this topic with grace and respect, ensuring sensitivity while satisfying curiosity.

1. Physical Proportions: While not foolproof, certain physical attributes can provide hints. Consider the size of his hands and feet — some believe they correlate with genital size, although this is not scientifically proven.

2. Confidence and Comfort: Men who are well-endowed may exude a certain confidence in their physicality, feeling comfortable in their own skin. They may not shy away from discussions about intimacy and may display ease during physical activities.

3. Clothing Fit: Pay attention to how his clothing fits, especially in the groin area. Tight-fitting pants or noticeable bulges could suggest ample endowment, though it’s essential not to rely solely on this indicator, as clothing styles and personal preferences vary.

4. Subtle Gestures: Watch for subtle gestures or adjustments he makes, such as discreetly rearranging himself or occasionally shifting his posture. These movements could be subconscious attempts to find comfort or accommodate his size.

5. Reactions to Intimacy: During intimate moments, observe his reactions and responses. While vocalizing pleasure or discomfort is not exclusive to size, it can offer insights into his physical sensations and preferences.

6. Communication: Open, honest communication is key in any relationship. If you’re comfortable discussing intimate matters, consider broaching the topic with sensitivity and respect. Approach the conversation with curiosity rather than judgment, emphasizing mutual understanding and connection.

7. Respect Boundaries: It’s crucial to respect boundaries and privacy. Not all men may feel comfortable discussing or disclosing intimate details, and it’s essential to honor their preferences and comfort levels.

Remember, the size of a man’s genitals does not define his worth or compatibility as a partner. While curiosity is natural, it’s essential to approach the topic with sensitivity and respect for your partner’s feelings. Focus on building trust, communication, and mutual satisfaction in your relationship, and let intimacy unfold naturally.

?? Have you ever wondered about your partner’s endowment? Share your experiences and insights in the comments below — let’s navigate this topic together with empathy and understanding. ??

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Are you ready?