The thing about being a sex writer is that you’re constantly speaking to the country’s best experts and being inspired to try new things.

So when interviewing a sexologist last month on how to invite a third person into the bedroom, I couldn’t help but take her tips to heart.

I just didn’t think that I would end up with a fourth, fifth and sixth body in the bed.

Chasing fantasies
Inspired to chase my own threesome fantasy, I’d logged back onto Feeld – essentially an app for curious minds looking for non-traditional hook-ups.

Which is how I found myself on a first date at a sex club with someone I’d never met before.

Nerve racking? Absolutely. Hot? As f*ck.

After meeting Noah for a cocktail (and instantly getting along thank God), we drove across town and entered the unmarked door of Our Secret Spot, a hidden swingers club in Sydney.

I’d been once before, but more as a voyeur, standing back to watch the wild scenes unfolding in front of me, and having my own fun with a friend in private.

This time though, I was there for the club’s Newbie Night. And to no surprise to anyone, it was a sold-out event.


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Years ago, the best friend of Kate Middleton announced the opening of a swingers club in Scotland after leading one in London called Killing Kittens. According to the club in Scotland, no man can enter the club — he can be brought only by one or more women.

Moreover, women make the rules in such clubs. They represent 80 percent of customers. The clientele is very selective, aged between 18 and 45 years. Killing Kittens in London claims to reject 1 of 3 applications.

Club attire is mandatory, and jeans are not allowed. Inside, drugs are prohibited, but clients can delight themselves with champagne. Condoms are strategically placed in all the rooms, and the atmosphere lures the most comfortable positions and outfits. After the talk and look of choosing potential partners, lovers retire in rooms where they "play," where cameras and mobile phones are completely banned.

For those who like this lifestyle, they think it is a healthier alternative than fixed online dating.


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The Backwards Slide position is a rather advanced position and works better with a partner with a well proportioned penis. To get into this position, the penetrating partner sits with legs outstretched and the receiving partner squats onto their partner for entry with one leg on either side of the partner. Then the receiving partner leans back until completely supporting their own body weight with hands on the floor.


More About The Backwards Slide Position

This position provides a great view for the seated partner, and a unique angle of penetration for the receiving partner. For more advanced couples, the receiving partner can grip the lower legs of their partner to move back and forth. It should be noted that this position carries with it a potential for injury and should be attempted with caution.


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My husband and I relocated to a different part of the country earlier this year. A couple of weeks after doing so, we met a really great couple who live locally and started seeing a lot of them.

We have so much in common – age, careers, hobbies and so on – and they’re great fun to be around and a very attractive pair.

The other evening when we were at their house for drinks, the guy made a joke that we should “take the party into the bedroom”.

I thought he was joking and my husband and I both laughed and moved the conversation on.

However, when we were leaving to go home, he leaned in and whispered: “Think about what I said. We’d all have fun together”. Now I don’t want to see them again because I feel so awkward!

The thought of it creeps me out. There’s no way me or my husband would ever entertain the idea of swinging with them. We’re just not that type of couple.

I’m not sure we can be friends with them now and my husband thinks the same, which is really sad as we ­absolutely loved their company.

Any advice?

What advice would you give to this reader? Have your say in the comment section

Coleen Nolan is the Mirror's resident agony aunt
Coleen Nolan is the Mirror's resident agony aunt
Coleen says
Oh dear, awkward! OK, you can tackle it one of two ways – either distance yourself from them and find new friends or the next time you’re all together, be up front and say ­something like, “Look, we love being friends with you, but we’re not into having sex with other couples, so it’s never going to happen”.

I guess that it all comes down to which route makes you feel the least uncomfortable.

If you’ve become good friends, then being direct could be a way forward – they might take it on the chin, laugh about it and you can all move on.

If you don’t say anything, you might find yourself ducking behind hedges to avoid them or being confronted over why you suddenly don’t want to see them any more.

But I guess the question you also have to ask ­yourself is – can you ever be at ease in their company after they have suggested a bedroom romp?

If the answer is no and it’s changed the friendship for you beyond repair, then I think you have to move on.

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Most of us will have heard of “Cuckold” which, despite having several interpretations, basically means husband of an adulterous woman with consent. Using direct language, it means “A man who gets horny watching his wife fuck other men. The so-called Corno Manso».

And what about a Cuckquean?

I’m not going to give “scientific” explanations, it’s a woman who gets excited by seeing her man with other women. And yes, it exists! And she is not a lover or a supporter of Polyamory, because the women who enter into this couple's fantasy are “disposable”, they are not part of any love relationship, only of sexual satisfaction.

I had the pleasure of meeting and talking to a Cuckquean and the sparkle in her eyes describing what she felt watching her husband fucking another woman with strength and determination left me excited, admired and excited at the same time, in short, a mixed feelings that are difficult to describe.

If, on the one hand, I didn't know that there were women with huge sexual openness and I felt excited about the news, on the other hand, I was amazed at the natural way in which she told me about her husband's adventures.

The first time I decided to put my fantasy into practice, we had been together for two years, I called him and said, "honey, I'm taking a friend home!", I didn't know that the friend had been his ex-girlfriend, it still went well in the same!

I asked her about the fact that she accepts women in her house, in her bed, as women are generally possessive. I consider myself a woman with sexual openness and I confess that I have had threesomes with boyfriends in a calm way but I have never imagined another woman in my bed, in my sheets and cleaning herself with my towels.

So fuck my man still uses my stuff?? None of that!

And I told her about this dilemma of mine and she replied:

"Oh Ana, the water and the soap are fantastic, they wash everything, I don't care about hair or perfumes. When I call my husband and he says he's at home with someone, I go faster, more horny, to still watch and In the end I still have breakfast with her, no problem… Wash everything and someone else comes, I have women at home with us from Monday to Friday without any problems!”

There are lucky men! I thought, I wish I had been born a man and been lucky enough to marry a “Cuckquean”. Conversation interrupted by the entrance of a pretty girl who liked the couple. They exchanged looks and I walked away.

At sunrise, several hours later, the three of them went down the stairs with big smiles and complicit looks like someone who had just had a good fuck.

When I said goodbye, I also left him one of my business cards. Who knows, maybe one day I'll watch all the action from a box.

In my case, it's just a shame that to taste the "honey" I would have to go through the chorizo, when the honey is much more interesting!

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